Post #15 Global Warming Grab Bag

Hello global warming enthusiasts! I would like to start this weeks post by offering my sincerest apologies for the month long hiatus in our global warming conversations. Most of our previous conversations were written during boring school days, as a means of keeping me awake during class. Now that summers here my time has been filled with work and other leisure activities, limiting the time I have to inform you on the latest warm the globe efforts. I've had calls and emails of concern from both sides of the global warming battle. I thank you guys for this.

This weeks post is sort of a grab bag of topics if you will. I've got a few random thoughts related to global warming on my mind, so I hope you're ready to bounce around like a beach ball at a Nickleback concert.

Global Warming Grab Bag

Recently, in a heated debate with one supporting the anti-global warming campaign, I was called a close-minded (explicit). I was told that my pro-global warming cause was totally one-sided, close-minded and indignant. Afterwords, I reflected on this feeble minded persons words.  This is what I came up with:

"Your cause is totally one sided." What a stupid comment. BOTH sides of the global warming cause are ONE SIDED. They're complete opposites. I've never heard an anti global warming activist say something along the lines of "Sorry guys, I can't come to the rally this week, I'll be clubbing baby seals in the arctic."  To say the anti-global warming cause isn't one-sided is ridiculous. They're extremists, just like us on the pro-side. The only difference is our cause is winning. And we're smart enough to see it.

"You're totally close-mined."  Are we? During our time together we've had a plethora of posts of the anti-recycling persuasion. And yet one week we also gave a couple examples of times it's OK to recycle ( i.e. when you can profit off these suckers). How's that for close-minded?

Item #2
We've had quite the wet spring, wouldn't you say? Flooding. Hundreds of houses washing away. Entire families.. no, wait.. NEIGHBORHOODS disappearing in the rain-rivers never to be seen again. It hasn't been very warm. How do the anti-warmers explain this? Simple. It's now being called global climate change. Whew! Crisis averted. Even the REALLY dumb ones were starting to notice all this global warming wasn't that warm at all. People were jumping off the bandwagon. And then... bippity-boppity-boo! Name change. Now everyone's back on board and crying green repentance in the streets.  "The globe isn't warming, the climate is changing. Yeah, that's why there's all this rain in June, climate change. It's uhh.. getting colder.. we thought it was warmer.. well, it was for a while, but now it's colder because of the climate change and... and... and... you should buy Al Gores magic light bulbs."

Item #3
Do you remember Earth Day? We treated Mother Earth like a queen and she thanked us with rain and snow for a week straight.  During that weeks post we broke down peoples ideas of the best way to celebrate Earth Day. Several people said we should celebrate by riding our bikes to work.  Stupid idea. Last week my car was in the shop getting some work done and I had no choice but to ride a bike to work. I wasn't excited for this at all. I live exactly THREE miles from my place of employment. Longest THREE mile ride ever. During my ride the bike chain came off twice, I got hit in the face by a bee and had several close calls with idiot Utah drivers. Moral of the story: Riding a bike to work is as stupid as wiping with both sides of the toilet paper. It's completely uncalled for.  If you have a bike- sell it- throw it away- blow it up- just get rid of it.  

Item #4
I heard the most mind blowing thing recently when talking to an anti-global warmer. The anti-warmer was ranting and raving about the need to save polar bears. Knowing that the polar bear nut was a fan of hot showers I posed this question: "What would you do if the only way to save the polar bears was to outlaw hot showers?"   I thought my question had them stumped.  I settled in and prepared myself for a long wait while they pondered the question at hand, but much to my surprise, without ANY hesitation they blurted out; "Polar bears can rot in hell. I'm going to enjoy my hot showers."

I guess the moral of this weeks post is this: The next time some anti-global warmer accuses you of being one-sided, close-minded or indignant, kindly remind them of the little saying 'three fingers point back to you.' Then give them one finger pointing up with the rest pointing down.

I'll do my best to keep you updated on the Warm the Globe efforts this summer. I might work off suggestions from you guys, so if you've got questions, thoughts, comments or ideas be sure to let me know and I'll cover it the best I can. Until then I wish you the best of luck as you take what we've learned and put it to practice. Remember: Permanent summer is the end goal here. Global warming is a good thing.